So now we have the Paralympics. It's going to be the best Paralympics ever. Because it's here. That's why it's going to be the best ever.
Politicians have tears of admiration in their eyes for those disabled people who have achieved being on the telly, stretching their bodies to the utmost. The same politicians take away the benefits of those disabled they say are stealing taxpayers' money and really should be working, just look at what can be achieved, look at the examples being set by your fitter brothers and sisters, get off your arse and get a job, come on, put some effort into it you shirking fake!
But as a spectacle, it's really difficult to get worked up about. How can you when you have admiration for every single participant? All athletes perform to the best of their capabilities and you want to see a race where there is a small margin between winners and losers. You want to get behind your man or woman, you desperately want your athlete to beat the rest, you couldn't give a shit if Mary Decker falls over, you think thank fuck for that. You want Great Britain to win a tight, exciting race. If not Britain, you want Jamaica. If not Jamaica, anybody but the USA. We love it when the Americans come just outside the medals. And more than anything we want Ovett to beat Coe.
How can the competitive emotions come to the fore when you're applauding everybody in the race, willing them all to do a personal best? Even Oscar Pistorius as he wins by five miles. Bloody hell, they're all to be admired. Even the Americans and the Tories.
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