Monday, August 01, 2011

Non-Stop Noel

Non-Stop Noel (mp3)

"What's this shit?" said Maud to Kate,
"Deal or No Deal. See that state?"
"Fucking hell, how old is she?"
"Younger than both you and me."
"Greed for money puts on years."
"Look at those two sad old dears."
"Can't they put on BBC?"
"They'd have to pay the license fee."
"So all we get is non-stop Noel?"
"It's not like being on the dole,
They can watch all kinds of shite,
They've all got fucking satellites."
"You're telling me that this is it,
Noel Edmonds, Smarmy Git?"
"He may look like a fucking gnome,
But he owns this fucking shitting home."


  1. It's Dole or no Dole.

  2. That's what they told me last week.

  3. Noel was much better back in the old SwapShop days (though that's not really saying much). Then he went downhill. I blame Mr Blobby.

  4. Edmonds believes in this strange cosmic ordering malarkey; essentially, if you write something down, you'll get it.

    Presumably he can't spell "non-gittish haircut".

  5. Chris - I could just about tolerate him on TOTP. Nothing else.

    Tim - Sounds like Amway to me.