Yes, we still watch TOTP. Just in case we miss something good. It would be simply awful if a good single were to sit there at tescodownloads.com, waiting for us to come and get it, and us not turning up for the party.
One of the singles of the year is Daddy Yankee's Gasolina. It was on TOTP the day Jeremy Clarkson co-presented. And Jeremy hated it. Jeremy likes the Floyd (post-Syd, presumably), and The Who. He is a middle aged man who knows what he likes.
TOTP is now presented by Fearne Cotton and a middle aged man. The middle aged man changes every week. Fearne just ages.
This week's Jeremy is BBC News Correspondent, Jeremy Bowen. Perfectly pleasant. Listened to Peel as a teenager. Likes Teenage Kicks. Likes Squeeze. I'm sure he must like the obligatory Clash. Would be a perfect guest for Jools' Hootenanny. Maybe drinking a bottle of Becks on a table with Phil Cornwell. Maybe a few nuts. I don't know. You never see what they get to eat.
Like all Jeremys, Jeremy has always wanted to present TOTP. Ever since he was a little Jeremy.
Oh, and TOTP's executive producer is former children's tv presenter Andi 'the guv' Peters.
Someone, somewhere, is taking the piss.
The Staircase in the Woods by Chuck Wendig
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