Sunday, June 03, 2007

Dear Jools,

Oh, Jools. I actually felt sorry for you when I saw this.

You suddenly looked old and frail, unable to hold your own. A tinkle here, a tinkle there. Those incontinence pants can't be far away, can they?

I suppose you were asking for it, asking to join in with a band who have a bit of life in them. You're ok though, Jack's a bit of a nutter and I think he enjoyed the opportunity to mess around with a bass guitar for a change. I don't think he was overly worried about how it sounded or looked. I don't think he was trying to humiliate you, Jools.

Earlier in the show Jack said that Tom Jones could make a good fist of this song. You agreed. Jack's a nutter, Jools, he doesn't really mean it. Remember that album you made with Tom? Tom doesn't. He's in a home now, sweating and shaking like an old man, just like his stage show. Still, I'm sure Tom will be back out for your Hootenanny and you two can find your own level, find something more suitable for your age.

Love Geoff


  1. Don't waste your sympathy Geoff.
    He could always stop at 'ome.

  2. But that poor little man with his little arms stretched over his keyboard!

    (Well, that's what I can see in the mirror at the moment).

  3. Haven't the bloody Stripes used up their 15 minutes!?
    My gawd how much further can they lower the bar? Most garage bands have a drummer.

    My favorite Jules is JULES Shear (of Polar Bears fame) but the sporadic irregular whacking on the skins reminded me of a line in JOOLS and Jim by Pete Townsend...

    Anyone can have an opinion
    Anyone can join in and jump
    Anyone can pay or just stay away
    Anyone can CRASH AND THUMP

  4. Dick - I refute the charge! Tom really only gets big knickers thrown at him nowadays.

    HE - I've never liked the Stripes' recordings but they usually give a decent live show. They'll be doing this for years to come don't you know!