Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Who's The Daddy?

Doesn't the Camerons' news put a smile on your face. A pregnancy is just the thing to perk up an election campaign. Mothers and mothers-to-be can relate to politics once again for the first time since Mrs Blair and Mrs Brown were in that wonderful life-giving state.

But who would make the best prime minister? He's got to be seen as virile and a good father. Fathers are so important in politics. Edward Heath was not a father. Look at what happened there!

The current state of affairs for the main UK political party leaders is as follows:-

Gordon Brown (Labour) - 2 children
David Cameron (Conservative) - 2 children, happily one on the way
Nick Clegg (Liberal Democrats) - 3 children
The Lord Pearson of Rannoch (UKIP) - 3 children, but disappointingly married 3 times
Caroline Lucas (Green) - 2 children, though yet to be a father
Nick Griffin (BNP) - 4 children

Of course it is important for the prime minister to have an impeccable marital history. This would rule out The Lord Pearson of Rannoch. Caroline Lucas is also a no no as the time for mothers running the country has gone - the Thatcher era was an historical blip. Gordon Brown has tried over the past few years to demonstrate his virility but no matter how good a father he may be he is just not young and thrusting enough for the modern electorate. David Cameron and Nick Clegg talk the talk but do they really walk the walk? Neither could honestly be described as "Mr Lover Man".

No, only one man will do as Prime Minister. Uncommonly handsome, exceedingly virile, a wonderful father, a moral leader, a man to bring the nation together, Ein Volk, ein Reich, ein Führer.

May 2010 will be Springtime for Griffin!


  1. You can imagine the children's birthday parties, can't you. Awkward.

  2. I've got 5 children and am uncommonly handsome so am thinking of standing. The second home expenses and free trips abroad would be nice .... think of me like a taxi.

  3. Rog, as far as I know, standing is not a reliable form of contraception. It may even be that a change of position provides impetus and encourages further child-producing activity.

  4. You shouldn't joke about these things.
    Anyhow, like the many politicians, Griffin is probably a fibber and is actually a paid up member of the multi-cultural society.

  5. Yes. Family = good. People don't trust the single and/or childless, had you noticed? We're clearly DEVIANT and should be shunned.

  6. *goes and sits next to DEVIANT Annie*

  7. I'm getting the same kind of sinking feeling that I got as we approached the election in 1979. I'm not sure I'm up for another stint of those twats.

  8. Boz - Uncle Adolf's Aryan Balloon Show.

    Rog - You're just the sort of man we need to clean up politics. Do you go south of the river?

    Vicus - An ability to do it standing up is necessary now with the limitations on expenses.

    Scarlet - So the white power thing was an advert for washing powder?

    Annie - There is no society but there is family. And families always pull together, don't they?

    MJ - Me too. There's something about us that's untrustworthy.

    Tom - Hopefully this will lose him a lot of votes... http://bit.ly/cIWSJ3

  9. oh. . .what can be said. You guyz comments says it all. Lmfo.

    I think 'Spitting Images' time, money and effort of our Political parties spoke the truith, the whole truith and nothing but the truith. . 'same ole. .same ole ' ;-p

  10. How can a person f*ck up a country if HE doesn't know how to f*ck?
    and, the proof is not in the pudknocking, it's in the size of his litter!!

    I sense that you are all quite resolved at having the Conservatives invade in May.

  11. You obviously can't run the country with brats crying in the next room all night.
    Sorry Edward - this is not a majority opinion.
    Most people (as Geoff points out) see it in a more positive light.

  12. Chazza - Indeed.

    Donn - There's no stopping them. A small majority, I'm afraid.

    Kaz - Thatcher proved that the best PMs get by on 4 hours sleep. Blair and Cameron are just making sure they get the same.

  13. If I remmeber rightly, Boris Johnson has quite a few children.

  14. I'm sure I'm not the only one whose first reaction was that the SamCam pregnancy was an election stunt, which goes to show how low politicians have sunk in our estimation.

    Can't decide whether I hate him more because he's Tory leader or because he claims to be a Villa fan.

  15. Dave and Prince William. What a pair!