Well, it's a Relief that's all over, isn't it?
The highlight of last night's extravaganza had to be the Mitchell & Webb snooker song with Chris de Burgh. It really was truly fucking abysmal and Betty was the luckier of the two of us in that she fell asleep after the ten second appearance of Kate Moss on the Little Britain debacle. We didn't sing along to the Proclaimers because although we're both bespectacled we have got a modicum of musical talent in that we can do Amy Winehouse's Rehab in pub singer voices which is a damn sight more entertaining than those 1980s hasbeens with their walking 1,000 miles. If they walked 500 miles away, why didn't they carry on walking 500 miles further into the fucking sea instead of walking 500 miles back to annoy us so? Peter Kay is the most overrated comedian of all time - he just sits there in that wheelchair doing fuck all, he has never ever made me laugh, what in God's name do you all see in him? Shite, shite and more shite all night long.
Don't get me wrong, we weren't actually watching it but watching a docudrama on the independence and division of India, just watching Comic Relief during breaks for urinating and refilling wine glasses. Betty thought Lord Mountbatten was quite dishy (well, actually the actor playing him). Gandhi wasn't played by Sir Ben Kingsley which I found disappointing as now my last image of Sir Ben is not of a blacked-up peacemaker but of a violent psychopathic gangster in Sexy Beast. Makes you wonder what would have happened if Ray Winstone was in charge of India's independence.
Still the funniest things to come out of my blog are the searches people use to get here. Here are the latest:-
1. Kung fu drawstring trousers
2. Does Noel Edmonds drink urine?
3. Grayson Perry posh bastards house
4. Does Prince Charles wipe his own arse?
I don't think he does.
Have a good weekend, y'all. I'm back to work on Monday for the run-up to the dreaded end of year.
UPDATE SUNDAY 18TH MARCH 2007 6PM
I've just woken up from my afternoon nap and that pissing song is still in my head. I don't see why you should be spared from this crap. Here's the link to the video if you want to see why I'm thinking about emigrating from this freakishly humourless land.
LOOOOOOOOK! THERE'S THE KRANKIES, EVERYONE!
8 hours ago