Sad news that after 76 years, the popular BBC situation comedy The Vicar of Dibley is to end. The situation comedy, written by 4 C*nts and a Funeral's Richard Curtis and starring the face of Chocolate Orange, Dawn French, has been a good, trusted friend to many of us, old and old.
Samaritans groups are at the ready to man phonelines as expected suicide attempts by vicars throughout the nation is expected to reach epic proportions.
"I'm long enough in the tooth to remember the end of Yes! Prime Minister," says Good Samaritan Rodney Pewes. "Conservative MPs were dropping like flies, sucking up oranges laced with strichnene like there was no tomorrow. Yes!! Prime Minister was their programme and I'm really dreading the possible effect the ending of The Vicar of Dibley could have on the vicar community."
"The Vicar of Dibley has been a real friend to vicars over the past 76 years," says Arthur Font, the Vicar of Dobley. "Dawn French has given me so much pleasure. Often I've been taking a wedding, closed my eyes for the hymn, and seen her frankly fucking gorgeous face up there in lights like a fucking beacon, shining God's light down on the poor bastards taking their worthless vows. I'm totally shocked that her life is near its end."
"I'm doubly shocked," says Jonathan Eyles, the Vicar of Dubley.