Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Junior Mastermind

Name: Jonathan Witsaboutim

Location: Swotsville

Subject: Green Day

Green Day? Green fucking Day?

Dad, why do you have to foist your taste in music on the poor sod? And then get him to memorise every single thing about that shitty so-called "punk" band?

Ooh, you big rebel, Dad. Green Day on Junior Mastermind!

Sorry Dad, these are the tossers who closed the coffin lid on Top of the Pops. Them and the Red Hot fucking Chilli Peppers, with their interminable live sets. Music for middle aged men with no concept of a pop tune. How in God's name is your son ever going to find himself a girlfriend if he's obsessed with Green chuffing Day at the age of 10? You've ruined him, Dad.


  1. billie joe5:10 PM

    Fuck off, man. That boy's a cool dude. He'll get the chicks, just like his daddy. You're just jealous, man. Just coz your daddy was into James Last. James Last, man. Your daddy was a loser, just like you with your corduroy pants and your polo neck sweaters. Man, what kinda teenager were you, anyway? Some kind of fucking dork, man, with your James Last LPs. White Riot, man. I need a fucking riot, man. You don't even like the Clash do you, loser?


  2. Billie Joe Spears6:16 PM

    Let's walk out through the moonlight and lay the blanket on the ground.

  3. billie bob (aged 28)6:22 PM

    Are you the Sandi Thom guy? Gee, you old guys are so cynical and make me sick! You know nothing about music that YOUNG people like and you're just jealous. As Billie Joe said, there you are in your corduroy pants, trying to tell US, the youth, that our music is wack.

    Green Day speak out for THE YOUTH. Suck on that, grandad!


  4. Richard Fleeshamn11:51 PM

    I don't like them either Geoff. I'd never have won playing one their songs would I. Craig didn't even like them. I've got my own blackberry now! Give my love to Betty

  5. Green Day remind me of the Levellers. He sings in EXACTLY the same way. No really.

  6. Anonymous8:47 AM

    My daughter went through a Green Day period, about ten years ago. I listened. I can see why she liked them. But I'm 54, so I'm probably agreeing with you.

    On the other hand, lay off da Chillies, maaaan.

  7. The great thing about the Chilli Peppers is that you only need to buy/steal/download one track. I am truly of the belief they've only ever been in the studio once for half an hour and that they keep re-releasing that session with a different name on it. Blimey, at least Kaiser Chiefs have a sense of humour

  8. Billy - I can't for the life of me remember what the Levellers sound like. I vaguely remember The Men They Couldn't Hang because my friend loved their version of Donald Wears Your Trousers. Or was it Donald Where's Your Trousers? I'm never quite sure. File under 80s shite, anyway.

    Mark - I genuinely can't see how teenagers get into Green Day. It's Dadrock to me, for Dads who are younger than me. Not that I'm a dad or anything.

    Richard - Agreed on Chilli Peppers. Put it away put it away put it away now.

  9. "My daughter went through a Green Day period..."

    And now features in a number of gynaecology text books.

  10. I think all those kids on 'Celebrity Master Mind' need a good slap. Or perhaps it should be the parents.

    The one good thing is that I can get a few questions right.

  11. You see, you can say these things now you're an ex-teacher, Kaz.

    One of the girls on Monday's episode was wearing lots of make-up. Her and Green Day boy are growing up too fast.

  12. Them aren't so bad. They did give us Gloria.

    With you all the way with the Chili Peppers though. Shite.

  13. My daughter was a Green Day adolescent too. Every time I sent her money she told me which album she'd now bought. She lives in the same borough as your good self so she's probably on a street corner near you right now in a hoodie.

  14. Tedward's Missing Ear10:27 PM

    I like Green Day. So there.