Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Street Survival

When I'm walking where there are people about...

If someone in front of me lights a cigarette I quicken my pace and overtake them.

If someone in front of me smells of bad body odour I quicken my pace and overtake them.

If someone in front of me smells of urine I quicken my pace and overtake them.

If someone in front of me has been shopping in Lush I quicken my pace and overtake them.

14 comments:

  1. What about if they've been shopping in Body Shop? Do you differentiate between synthetic and natural soap products.

    ReplyDelete
  2. We had a problem here when the fumes from the Lush store were overwhelming the restaurant diners next door to them.

    ReplyDelete
  3. We don't get many Lush's in Norfolk....

    ...er, come to think of it we do!

    ReplyDelete
  4. If there's a Lush ahead of me i get out of smelling range. Jeez, you could choke on the smell.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous8:01 PM

    Every time I walk past a Lush I have a flashback to 'Nam.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Istvanski - Body Shop is much more subtle. Their products smell of that great decade, the eighties.

    MJ - I wouldn't eat within a mile of a Lush store. They're toxic!

    Murph - I thought Norfolk was a "dry" county. Or is that just the local wit?

    Llewtrah - I went in one once. The staff were very friendly and asked if they could help me. Then I passed out.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Wyndham - I love the smell of Lush in the morning.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous3:21 AM

    I'd rather smell freshly fried donuts. Rather bathe in them as well. Nice bit of exfoliation.

    Don't know where that came from. I've only had the one Corona.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Do you stay in your own lane?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Arabella - And you can hang them up. Big blocks of Lush stick to your bath.

    Kaz - I veer wildly.

    ReplyDelete
  11. You need to purchase a segue so that you can run them over like Ben Hur!
    That would be cool.

    Whatever happened to patchouli anyway? Everybody either smelled like weed or patchouli back in the 70s.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm sure there's plenty at a Rush gig.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Funny - I am obviously an idiot as I just hold my breath for as long as I possibly can when walking past/near someone smelly - same with butchers shops and funeral parlours - I always hold my breath when I walk past. As for Lush - I actually retched rather violently outside the Kingston store once - I wish I had been properly sick just to make them realise how utterly revolting that store is. I think LUSH should be shut down for contravention of human rights.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I wonder how many people have been sick inside the store. They wouldn't need to clean it up as the fresh Lush smell would overpower the puke.

    ReplyDelete