Sunday, October 15, 2006

Oh Henry

This week we reached a milestone (or "millstone" as Alan Pardew might say).

It was "Goodbye" to the bagless Dyson vacuum cleaner and "Hello" to a brand new Henry.

Ordinary people on the internet review site were more than happy with their Henry. I know the Dyson is a design classic and all that but Henry sounds like a robust little beast with incredible suction power for his size.

And what do you think of this?

With every new Henry, they're giving away a Henry shopping bag.

Here's Betty modelling it after a visit to the town centre.

As I carried our new Henry shopping bag into Sainsbury's, HMV, Superdrug, and Sussex Stationers, people stopped me and said how much it pleased them to see that cheeky smiling face. Teenagers pointed at me and laughed. Shop assistants said how cute he was.

Now could be the time for me to get into local politics. The Man With The Henry Bag Party. Who could resist me? I could give rides to babies and small dogs, me roller skating up and down the precinct with a baby in my bag. Maybe more than one baby, maybe twins, as you can see there's plenty of room in a Henry bag.

Councillor Geoff has a certain ring to it, doesn't it?


  1. There's even room for an encrusted pair of jammie bottoms Geoff.

  2. Oh I love your new Henry.
    Henrying would make Hoovering a pleasure. I absolutely hate Dysoning.

    Take care with that bag - The News of the World may get suspicious.

  3. Betty is the new Vanna White (American game show hostess with a flair for presenting merchandise.. in case you don't have the pleasure (gag) of viewing 'Wheel of Fortune' over there.)

  4. Would you be at all the council meetings with the Henry bag on your head in order to remain enigmatic?

  5. We've got a Henry too. It's very good. But we didn't get a free bag with it.

    I feel quite bereft.

  6. Murph- There's room for Oz if he wants a ride.

    Kaz - The Dyson was a failed attempt at keeping up with the people with taste.

    MJ - We had our version. Am I the new Les Dennis?

    Billy - I'd bring the sandwiches in it. And my notes.

    Spin - I'm sure the nice people at Numatic would send you one if you asked nicely. Numatic? Don't they make drills for roadworks? With smiley faces on?

  7. But why did you dump the Dyson. Ours works fine and I've just about rebuilt it in spare parts over the years since we've had it.
    So come on Geoff, I need to know, is Henry really much better.

  8. Geoff, do you ever stay in your office after hours? If you don't this will give you a taster of what it's like. If Betty can sing in Polish then it will be even more realistic.

  9. Tom - Ours lasted about 10 years. I doubt the Henry will do the same but it's quite impressive.

    Richard - I've used the one at work: that's what made me plump for a Henry. If Betty could sing in Polish we'd form a rockabilly band, The New Polecats.

  10. I really, really like that Henry bag. Does that make me really sad?

    Oh God...I think I'm finally turning into my mother.

    Then again...I get excited by those 'Bag for Life' things.

  11. Can we have more pictures of Betty modelling things please?

    I like looking in your shopping bag too. We've had the fridge and the bookcase...can we see in your cupboards now?

  12. Why is Henry smiling so much ...also...Betty has very sleak and unwrinkled arms for 60 odd....does she drink babies blood for that youthful look?

  13. Yeah, I'm not sure they are the Bettsters arms and hands either, unless she is deliberately misleading us into thinking she is wrinkly old bat.

  14. Molly - I'd love to get Betty into modelling. Fairy Liquid next? And I'd let you see in our cupboards but the mouse is camera shy.

    Undercrackers/Tom - Henry knows something we don't. It's the Fairy Liquid that keeps Betty's hands and arms so youthful looking. For hands that do dishes as mild as your face, use mild green...Fairy Liquid.

    By the way, we are having a major Orange internet outage at home at the moment so there'll probably be no Betty on the 'net till tomorrow.

  15. *gets some Fairy Liquid and bathes in it*

  16. Orange Outage ... you missed out the central "r" Geoff.

    Q: What's the difference between Orange and your Henry?

    A: Heny has a sucking force, etc

  17. Orange said a third party was to blame.

    If they'd stop partying and get some work done, maybe they wouldn't have these problems inh the first place.

  18. ..but Mr.Dyson spent years developing thousands of prototypes..
    he sounds so convincing in the adverts!
    I don't think that we have Henry out here in the a 'Henry' is a bigass buffalo hunting rifle so they will have to change the name.
    Love the bag. Make sure you keep all of your campaign literature in it when you start going door to door.

  19. I could carry a Henry rifle, too - make sure they vote for me.

  20. My mum loves her Henry (no, my dad's name's Ted).