Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Dance What Off?

This year's Corrie workout babe is Vicky Binns. Vicky plays Molly, mad staring-eyed daughter of lonely, obese, face like a punched doughnut, bottle-bottomed spectacle wearer, baker Diggory Compton. She found love with slack-jawed, overweight, face like a Yorkshire pudding, ignoramus, car mechanic Tyrone Dobbs and has lost her love handles just for him.

Last year's Corrie workout babe was Vicky Entwistle who plays wasp-chewing, face like a bag of spanners, voice like chalk scraping a blackboard, seamstress Janice Battersby.

Next year's Corrie workout babe, according to the missus, is likely to be Jennie McAlpine who plays Fizz Brown. I like Fizz and won't hear a word said against her.

The name Vicky Binns just happens to be a combination of two high street off licences, Victoria Wines and Oddbins. Molly Compton happens to be one of the least alchoholic Corrie characters. Vicky is missing an opportunity.

for more soap workout fun, see Wyndham


  1. Corrie writer Darren Little's fecked off to Hollyoaks now, hasn't he?

    They'll have a vacancy then for a new writer on Corrie and you're the man for the job.

    "Face like a Yorkshire pudding"... nice one.

  2. All the workouts in the world won't improve Tyrone much - he needs an expert plastic surgeon and a personality transplant.

    Meanwhile I predict Mollie and Dev are going to get pally behind that counter .... and I might get a life.

  3. Kaz: I read an obit of a man who died in his armchair watching Coronation Street.

    I predict a similar fate for myself.

  4. Fizz Brown sounds like another alcoholic drink. They are slipping in subliminal booze ads all over the place.

  5. MJ - Doesn't Hollyoaks only have the young and beautiful? You need some ugly actors to make a decent soap. They make the good-looking ones look even more attractive.

    Kaz - Yes, but Tyrone has had three girlfriends, the first of which was a cracker! There's no way a Tyrone would get even one girlfriend in real live.

    MJ - We watch it side by side on the settee. I hope we go together.

    Murph - I know her brother, Newky.

  6. One of my colleagues gets his "workout" while fantasising about Hollyoaks. He has very good muscle tone in one arm and a firm grip. I think he ought to change hands sometimes ....

  7. In those circumstances it's best to exercise the "writing" hand.

  8. Anonymous10:52 PM

    I had no idea who Vicky Binns was until Veronica told me who she was. Is Diggory still in Corrie? does he have a workout dvd?

  9. Surely someone called Diggory belongs on Emmerdale Farm? Via Middle Earth.

  10. Wyndham - Diggory left some time ago. He was originally Fred Elliott's rival at the Square Dealers. A minor character who they tried to build up into someone interesting by giving him a shop on the Street. He went out of business and nobody gave a shit.

    Arabella - I saw the end of Emmerdale the other night. Linda Lusardi was acting her socks off. Which made me think...whatever became of Terry, her hod carrying boyfriend?

  11. One of the Wicked Witches of Elstree - Danielle Lloyd - has a fitness video out. There is a conspicuous black man right up in the front row stretching and bouncing along with her.


    Why do I know this?

  12. ...and when is the Ena Sharples Pie Workout 78rpm record out for my Stereogram?

  13. You have to wear a hairnet to do it.