Wednesday, February 22, 2006

16 Reasons Why Most Physical Comedy Just Isn't Funny

1. Clowns - Scary, yes. Funny? You're having a laugh.

2. The Greats of the Silent Screen - Bring on the talkies, Mr Jolsen! Stop eating that bleeding shoe, Charlie!

3. Jacques Tati - Un homme et un bicyclette avec pipe et imper = Flasheur.

4. Funny Walk (Max Wall/John Cleese) - Funny walk? You want to see a funny walk? Try the penguins at the zoo.

5. Jack Douglas' physical jerks - Disturbing, yes. Funny?

6. Norman Wisdom's physical jerks - Puerile, but your kids won't laugh at him. He's 90, you know. And never had a funny day in his life.

7. Wrestling - Overgrown schoolboys, aged 7. This includes women wrestlers and "the great" Andy Kaufman*.

8. Benny Hill chases - Benny Hill was (probably still is) massive in France. My sister once had a French penfriend who said to me, "Did you know Benny Hill is French?" Nope, he's ours I'm afraid.

9. Michael Crawford, on roller skates, hanging off the back of a Routemaster bus - Ooh Betty, shoot the bastard, will you?

10. Rod Hull/Bernie Clifton - Nice try, but we know it's you making that bird do those stoopid things.

11. Ennio Marchetto/Andy Kaufman* miming to records in costume - Ok clever clogs, I'm impressed. I'm not laughing, though.

12. Del Boy falling through the bar - "It makes you cry with laughter every time you see it even though you know what's coming." Does it, fuck!

13. Lee Evans' sweaty monkey face and body - Lord, give me strength. BACK TO THE ZOO.

14. Dawn French sticking out her tongue - Overgrown schoolgirl, aged 3.

15. Ricky Gervais' dance - The only crap thing about The Office. Seems to go on for ever.

16. Matt Lucas getting up out of his wheelchair again and again and again and and again and again and again and again and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again and and again and again.


* I only know Andy Kaufman from his silly voice in Taxi and the film Man on the Moon in which he was portrayed by the awful Jim Carrey.

7 comments:

  1. I never tire of Matt Lucas getting up out of his wheelchair again and again and again ad nauseam. I am easily amused.

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  2. Why is it physical comedians keep doing this stuff well in to their 80s. Nobody over 40 should do physical comedy, let alone geriatrics. You used to see it a lot on Sunday Night At The Sunday Palladium. "Here comes Max Wall!" Those comics were just weird and sinister, Wisdom was - is - just pathetic.

    As far as I know, The Chuckle Brothers are still at it. Do we really want our children exposed to that kind of stuff?

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  3. I had a dream last night that I was paralysed from drink and curry. Matt Lucas said to me, in a really smug tone of voice, "I used to get similar symptoms but nowadays I only drink a thimbleful of wine. And I've cut down on my salt intake, too."

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  4. MJ suddenly finds herself adrift and sleepwalking. Am I in the Dream Blog or that other Geoff blog? I'm easily amused AND easily confused.

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  5. Wyndham - I really think it should all be banned, apart from the bloke who does the funny dance in Chappelle's Show. He makes me laugh every time I see him. One other thing that used to really get my goat was a street entertainer in Covent Garden who used to follow unsuspecting pedestrians across the square and mimic their gait for tourists to laugh at. I always thought if he did that to me I'd follow him for the rest of the day until he'd have to call the police.

    MJ - This was a case of my blogging influencing my dreams. My next post will be all about Marisa Tomei.

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  6. Was it Norman Wisdom that was on Coronation St? He sold/bought an exercise bike from Jack and Vera and pretty much stumbled through his whole performance. Someone told me he was a comic genius,, I just found him a big annoying waste of time!

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  7. That's him, Lori.

    Apparently he's massive in Albania. I don't know why but maybe his mannerisms mimic a much loathed politician's? I can't think of any other reason.

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