Thursday, August 07, 2008

Tighten Your Belts, It's Going To Be A Bumpy Ride

We're extremely sad to hear the news that four-eyed "karaoke" Howard Brown is to be replaced as the face of Halifax. Apparently his cheery demeanour is contrary to the mood of the nation in these credit crunch times. All other singing staff are also no longer required.

The new Halifax adverts will feature Shakespearian actors. Halifax staff were screen tested for the roles but were unable to pull off the gravitas.


  1. Do you call this "Posting like a demon"?

  2. Well done Halifax. That is much more suitable for the current state of National credit mourning.

    "A House! A House! My kingdom for a House!"

    PS I was very sorry to learn of the demise of Freddy Mack. His Otis Redding numbers were much better than Geno Washington's.

  3. What they haven't told yet is they've taken him outside and shot him.

    (No actual brand ambassadors were hurt during the posting of this comment).

  4. I agree with Boz, kill him.

    A guy on my blog said his kids were scared of him! He does look a bit like a jolly paedophile in those glasses.

  5. Kaz - I'm like a crazed dervish!

    Murph - "He hath eaten me out of house and home, he hath
    put all my substance into that fat belly of his..." Bloody hell, there's a Shakespeare quote for everything. Maybe Howard can do a Freddy Mack tribute act.

    Boz - He died laughing.

    Leyton - Welcome. At least he'll still be getting his eye tests paid for.

  6. I agree with Murph. Perhaps they'll focus on a Shakespearian tragedy for the next ad.

  7. Alas poor Howard. I knew him, Horatio.

  8. Anonymous2:45 PM

    It's a victory of sorts. Shame billions had to be wiped off markets and equities to get rid of this mofo, but anyways, the damage is done. I'm never doing business with Halifax as long as I live. I had no intention to anyway, makes it easier. Not like Gillette. They really do make the best blades - but since that cunt Federer and his nobhead mates all filmed in different continents with cheesy grins and Black Magic suits on turn up being the smuggest trio since Gary Lineker cloned himself in wankmode, I've had to phase them out for Wilkinson Swords.

  9. Welcome Crump.

    So Walkers crisps lost your custom too?

  10. Anonymous10:43 PM

    Oh yeah. Oh fuckin yeah. Don't get me started on BBC sport coverage.