Sunday, December 30, 2007

I'm Shit At Small Talk - Part 437

I go to the bar to order a round. The CD starts again - All Day And All Of The Night. The young barman asks his co-worker if this is The Kinks. She doesn't know. He looks at me. "Yes," I say, "it is The Kinks".

"It's not You Really Got Me, is it?" he says.


"I like that one. It sounds similar. I like The Kinks."

"Me too," I say. I've always liked the Beatles and Stones but only really liked The Kinks for the past few years."

"I'm a DJ, you know. 60s, 70s and 80s. I DJ'd here on Christmas Eve. Were you here?"


"I love the 60s stuff. Specially the Beach Boys. I love the Beach Boys."

"Pet Sounds?"


"Pet Sounds. It's a Beach Boys album. God Only Knows?"


"God Only Knows. It's a song on Pet Sounds."

"I like I Get Around."

"Yeah, their earlier stuff is good, too."

My music history lesson over, I pay for the drinks. I go back to our table and continue to talk Jupitus.


  1. Hang On To Your Ego, Geoff, because you Just Weren't Made for Times Like These and maybe you should Go Away For Awhile.

    God Only Knows, indeed.

  2. I decided not to say "that Brian Wilson's a genius, isn't he?" because I'd only get another quizzicle look.

  3. Without him they went to Kokomo...not a place I chose to go.

  4. You could be like Johnny Marr -visiting professor of popular music at Salford University.

  5. I don't think I'd get much respect from the kids.

  6. I think your conversation would have been so much more interesting had you said any of:
    Don't talk, put your head on my shoulder.
    You're so good to me.
    Do you wanna dance.

    I can't always be there to advise, you know.

  7. Or go the whole hog with I'd love just once to see you in the nude.

  8. Well, at least I recognise the name of the band in this post. Happy 2008 Geoff.
    OK, I've typed in three of those jumbled word things and it just isn't having it, so bollocks, one more go.

  9. By their hideously obvious record collections thou shalt know them.

    Have a splendid New Year, Geoff, and the same to your delightful missus.

  10. You could have slipped in a comment like "Mike Love. That's a training course book for DJ's isn't it?".

    Happy New Hootenanny Geoff & Betty!

  11. Happy New Year to a swell pair of Kents.

  12. Happy New Year, everybody!

    You see, I can type an exclamation mark and make it look as though I'm a fun loving guy. Isn't the internet wonderful?

  13. Happy New Year Geoff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    That's enough exclamation marks, no need to over-do it.

  14. That reminds me of a great quote from Flight of the Conchords (the Guide's favourite programme EVER)

    "Actually Fleetwood Mac wrote some of their best stuff while they had a love triangle going on"


    "No. It's all true."

  15. Oh, and happy new year! Apologies for lateness

  16. Happy new year, Cal.